YAMAS: THE FIVE RESTRAINTS

What better time than January, the depths of winter, for a little introspection! Having spent the last five weeks in class studying the yamas, the five restraints, I have become all too aware of the times when I am challenged by these principles.
Let's start with the first yama, ahimsa (non-harming).
Kyle Miller, states "Compassion is essential to the practice of ahimsa because it helps us break down the differences we've constructed between ourselves and others. By really seeing yourself in someone else's shoes, you begin to understand that we are all the same, all trying to survive and be happy, and the desire to inflict harm is automatically lessened."
I get that I'm not supposed to physically harm another human being or living thing, but it doesn't stop there. If I am thinking negative thoughts about another person, I not only harm him/her, but I harm myself with that negativity. How often I find negative, harmful thoughts entering my consciousness! To break the chain of harmful thinking, I can bless the other person and forgive myself for being human. I could go on and on, but this is meant to scratch the surface, making room for your thoughts. Besides, there are four more yamas!

Satya, translated as truthfullness, is the second of the yamas. With regard to satya, Lauren Flax, says "Simply defined, this is "truth within". We each have a space of truth-our own absolute personal truth. It can not be wrong, it shouldn't be judged. It is a nugget of pureness and -I think- that is where we feel most at home. When we are living in our most authentic vibration, when our actions align with our life affirming intentions, we are experiencing satya."
Isn't this the purpose of our existence, searching for our own personal truth? What I know, however, is that my truth does not always align with another's. As long as I am intending no harm, ahimsa, then I must follow my truth. This yama becomes a whole lot more than not telling lies!

Asteya, or non-stealing, is the third yama. On the "yogawithamy" blog, this insight was shared: "While reflecting on incorporating asteya into one's life, it is also worthwhile to remember some of the intangible ways in which we take from others. Being knowingly tardy to an appointment with a friend presumes that our time is more valuable than theirs. Speaking on behalf of another takes away their opportunity to express themselves. Doing homework for, or stifling curiosity in children robs them of learning on their own. Presupposing the outcome of a disagreement with a loved one steals both parties from the chance to carve out a new path to a familiar worry. Taking credit for ideas which are not rightly yours,or accepting praise which is undue are also examples of taking something which is not yours to take."
In downplaying my talents, not sharing my gifts with the world I am robbing myself of the chance to shine. This withholding is a form of stealing. No one benefits there. In what life situations, or with whom are you taking more than your give?

Moderation of the senses, or brahmacharya, is the fourth yama.
Jenn Ryan puts it this way: "It is important to apply moderation to moderation also, so it is not a burden. It is a beautiful practice. It is about moderating the extremes, not wanting too much and being happy with what you have. The practice of Wanting Wanting Wanting will always leave you feeling unsatisfied."
I can find the practice of moderation quite challenging. It seems as though there is a fine line between doing too much and not doing quite enough. I like to push myself physically, whether it is on the mat or the ski slopes. I have been practicing stopping before I succumb to complete exhaustion. If I am truly listening to my body, I will have more to give at a later time. Moderation of thoughts can be quite tricky. Usually when I'm getting carried away with obsessive thinking, I need to get physical, to shift my focus. A little asana practice and some alternate nostril breathing, followed by meditation can be all it takes to moderate my thoughts. When it comes to alcohol and drug addiction, things become more complicated. All of this is, in theory, is simple, but not easy!

The fifth yama, aparigraha, is non-possessiveness.
Marimar Higgins, shares her insight into aparigraha: "On a more philosophical level, aparigraha is the practice of letting go and allowing for change. Just as our inhale and exhale keeps us alive, there is an expansion and contraction of all things. We give and we take. We obtain and we give away. In this way, aparigraha looks not only at physical possessions but also at the beliefs, ideas and even grudges that we hold onto (or hoard). Aparigraha is about inviting the present moment to just be what it is. When we notice what we have rather than what we lack, all we need will be acquired."
How often in my life I have held onto an idea of how I "think things should be." When I grasp at these unreal expectations, I am not accepting what is. I see this principle of non-possessiveness as all about acceptance: acceptance that I have enough, that my thoughts/ideas are not the only ones or, necessarily, the right ones, that the people in my life will do just fine if I can just loosen my hold on them!

In essence, I see the yamas as a path towards personal freedom. I don't see the practice of the restraints as an indictment for my errors, but more as a gentle guideline for good living. After all, that is what life is all about, practice, practice, practice!